Vulcan Biology

by Jane Carnall

(inspiration; Tallulah)

"You must leave, Jim," Spock hissed. "Leave while there is still time. Soon I will enter the plak tow." The Vulcan was sweating heavily; his uniform looked soaked and he had gone a darker shade.

Kirk shuffled his feet. "I can't just leave you to die..." he said, miserably wishing he could. He'd heard rumours about Vulcan penises; towering pillars that burnt like fire.

"I won't die," Spock whispered. "I'm not bonded. The pon farr is only deadly to a bonded male who cannot reach his mate. The plak tow in such cases is merely... not to be witnessed by outsiders... go, Jim, I beg of you!"

The Vulcan was shuddering, radiating heat like a bonfire, and Kirk had actually no urge at all to stay anywhere near him. "Well, all right then, I'll go." He started to back towards the door, when Spock arched and cried out, a squalling screech that sounded like an enraged alley cat multiplied by several factors of ten. "Spock! Are you all right?"

The Vulcan rolled over, up on to his hands and knees, crouching with raised ass on the bunk and rocking back and forth, crooning softly. "James..."

Extremely worried now, Kirk reached for the door control, but Spock pounced first, knocking him to the deck and rubbing the side of his face against Kirk's shoulder. "Oh, James... fuck me... fuck me..."

"Mr Spock!"

Crooning, Spock rolled off Kirk and stretched himself with sensual abandon on the deck, displaying himself wantonly and beginning to take off his uniform. Frozen, Kirk watched the weirdest strip show he'd ever seen, as the Vulcan twisted and squirmed, somehow managing to moan "fuck me" and croon simultaneously.

Once again he crouched, raising his backside and presenting it to Kirk, the croon rising to a raucous cry of frustration.

"Oh, shit."

=@=@=

Did James ("T" for "Tomcat") Kirk take advantage of his first officer's vulnerability and need? Sadly, no. Having finally seen an uncensored Vulcan penis, he knew he just couldn't compete; while it wasn't particularly large, and presumably the colour didn't matter, it was also covered in small sharp spiky hairs that pointed backwards. He just didn't much feel like putting out for any tom dickin' hairy.

=@=@=

with apologies to Doc Webster, Spider Robinson, and Callahan's Place fans in general...

and the literal translation of "plak tow", Vulcan to human, is indeed "on heat" -- check the T'Planha Standard Lexicon....

1987

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